BoomerChicks

Forgetful Moments or...CRS

RJ and I received an email this morning from his sister.  It contained this video.

We cracked up because this song is so close to home for the two of us.  I can't tell you how often we are looking for something or don't remember we should be somewhere.  In RJ's case his wallet, keys and glasses are on the top of his list. 

"Did you see my glasses?" he'll ask.

"No", I reply, "I don't wear them." 

"Well, you must have moved them.  They were laying right here." as he points to the coffee table. 

"Why am I responsible for your stuff?  I have enough to remember on my own without having to keep track of your life."

A stressful five minutes passes as we look for his glasses, complaining back and forth and playing the blame game. 

"They're hanging around your neck!" I cry out, after exhausting every possible place they could be.  RJ looks down and sure enough, there they are hanging from his neck on that stringy clip thing he bought so he would have them with him at all times. 

He puts them on, quite content now that he has found his eyes and moves on without saying a word.  I, on the other hand, have to put my two cents in.

"Yep, I took your glasses.  I hid them from you so you wouldn't find them.  Yep, that's what I did." 

I guess I am expecting some sort of apology or affirmation that he was the one who couldn't remember where he put his glasses!  After I complain that I was not the glass stealing culprit, his response goes something like this.  "Well, you are always moving stuff and putting things away so no one can find anything!"  It's the same scenario every time.  To add insult to injury, I have to then try and remember what I was doing before I was pulled away to look for his glasses!

It has been particularly challenging for the two of us now that we are on this "everything has its place" kick.  Yesterday, I found his screw driver in the laundry hamper. 

 "What the hell is this doing in with the laundry?" I asked him. 

 "I didn't put it there", he replied. 

"Of course you didn't!" I tell him.  "It just got up and jumped into the hamper by itself or may be it sprouted wings and crash landed in with the dirty clothes!  Put it where it belongs!"

For some reason everyone believes that it is the mama of the house that should know where everything is.  Now that I have been organinzing everything in clear plastic containers with labels on the front, I love it when someone asks me for something. 

"Where's the dog shampoo?" my son asks.  "In the clear plastic container marked DOG GROOMING SUPPLIES on the pet shelf", I sarcastically respond. 

"Stupid", he mutters under his breath.

"Huh, what?  I didn't hear you!" I laugh. 

It is daunting trying to remember not only your stuff, but everyone else's stuff.  As much as I write things down in my planner, I sometimes forget to look at that damn thing even as it stares at me from my desk.  I continue to have my own episodes of CSR which on occasion has resulted in near disaster.    

"Mom, the city is here to turn off the water", my daughter said the morning of my father's funeral.

"What! Why would they do that?" as I run down the stairs trying to put clothes on my half dressed body. 

"The water guy said you didn't pay the bill", she responds.  

"What bill?  Tell him he can't do this!"

I finally got outside and begged the orange vested city official to reconsider.  "We are having a reception here today after my father's funeral, I can't have no running water!" I tell him.  He hands me a paper and tells me to call so and so at the utility desk.  "She'll take a payment over the phone", he says.  "I'll wait while you get a confirmation number that the bill has been paid."

Thankfully, we had running water that day.  And, thankfully RJ's CSR has made it possible that he only remembered that incident for five minutes before it faded into the abyss of his brain.  It makes my life so much better that he can't throw it up in my face while we search for the umpteenth time for the glasses hanging around his neck!

Aloha from 1972

Sifting through my boxes of stuff has brought me a lot of laughs.  It is quite possibly the reason why I can't seem to get this organization project finished.  I have basically been through all of the "things" boxes and have now moved onto the thirty or more boxes of paper. 

These boxes contain just about everything one can imagine that most people throw away.  I seem to have kept everything, but it has, like I said, provided some good laughs. 

I found the receipt for the plane tickets from my 1972 trip to Hawaii.  Round trip ticket from San Diego to Honolulu - $114.00!  That's once all the tax was added in.  Island hopping from Honolulu to Hana - $12.00!  These will be nice mementos to add to a scrapbook someday.

I also found a page from a journal I kept from that same trip.  Hopefully I will find the entire journal, but if not, I have a kazillion letters that I exchanged with friends and family here on the mainland while trekking around the islands with a backpack and a tent.

This particular journal entry gave me a good laugh though.  God, I was so young and silly.  My friends and I would laugh at everything.  The entry is dated June 3, 1972 and reads:

"The plane was an hour late taking off and "S" and I cruised the airport to see what was happening.  We got a little hungry so we went into a snack shop.  Everything was pretty expensive.  Luckily we were in the mood for a brownie, the cheapest thing on the menu.  However, they were in small portions so when the chick asked us what we'd like, we told her the biggest brownie you have.  She was peeved but we were hungry.  We chowed down on those brownies next to a drinking fountain.  Our next adventure was in a telephone booth.  We decided to call each other on the pay phones.  I deposited a dime but since we were economizing, we just let it ring, just to blow people's minds."

As I read this entry, I remembered that my friends and I loved the word "peeved" and we used it often.  It was always pronounced with a great deal of emphasis --P -EEEEEEEEEEEEE- VED.  Eventually we substituted the word for "pissed off" due to a cat we had found whom we named Leo.  Leo was not very friendly and always seemed mad.  Calling him Peeved Leo just didn't cut it so we dubbed him Pissed Off Leo and it stuck.  From that moment on, any angry person we met was referred to as a Pissed Off Leo. 

The telephone booth episode is historic.  First, who can make a call for a dime, or even better yet, who uses a telephone booth these days?  Superman would be in a world of hurt today.  We did make public pay phones ring though, and we would make them ring and ring and ring until the people nearby would get so ticked by the distraction, they'd answer them only to find no one there.  Naturally, we would roar with laughter, thinking we were so clever and sneaky.  I wonder now just how many were onto our little game.  It was so much better than prank calling from the home phone because we got to see the faces and reactions of our victims.  We died laughing. 

As ridiculous as all this may sound, these were innocent and harmless gestures of our immaturity or should I say, our growing years.  What was far more wonderful was that we were four teenage females, taking off to Hawaii for adventure and discovery.  We paid for the entire trip ourselves without parental donations, working at fast food joints and saving.  We had no chaperones or means of communication with our folks back on the mainland, other than the two cent postcards we would send home. 

Along with my plane tickets and journal entry, I also found the receipt for my Travelers Cheques, a grand total of $290.  I stayed months in Hawaii on that small amount of money.  I knew exactly how to budget, often times picking wild avocados for the day's meal.  We had no interest in hotels or souvenirs and used our thumbs as our means of transportation. 

Ah, the good old days!  This must be a sure sign that I am getting older as I tell stories about how times have changed.  Those were the days though when life was simpler and allowed for raw adventure that one only seems to find on a reality show these days. 

 

Boomer Chicks Gone Wild

Back in my day, we loved to toilet paper people's houses. It was quite daring then, not like it is now, where parents don't really care if the house is TP'd. In fact, they will usually clean up the mess to save their younguns from having to do any excessive chores.

It seems that my generation has found an entirely new use for toilet paper these days. This is hysterical!

All you Boomer Chicks out there have a great and glorious weekend!

Need Cheering?

Bill Gates started Microsoft in a recession.

This will end long before those who started it are paroled.

Self worth beats net worth.

Stop obsessing about the economy, you're scaring the children.

Interesting fact about recessions...they end.

Feeling warm and fuzzy all over yet?

Well, Recession 101, an advertising campaign which began in Rhode Island through the funding of an "anonymous" donor is hoping that these catch phrases will resonate with you. 

I don't know much about this Recession 101 campaign.  I'm not sure anyone knows much about it.  I did read that the "donor" was depressed over the public's negative reaction to the economy, hence deciding that we, the people, needed a positive spin on these difficult times.   Now, for the most part I have a Pollyanna outlook, but a reality check tells me that there were better things that could have been done with the big bucks it required to plaster a public lecture onto a bilboard for our reading pleasure. 

Does anyone really think that the people most affected by this recession are in the mood for a pep talk from a billboard campaign?  I don't know about you, but I am completely aware that this country has undergone past recessions and recovered.  You'd have to be living in a cave in Outer Mongolia to not know that.  I know that my self worth is more than my net worth...duh?   No one needs to talk down to the citizens of this country about this recession.  We get it!

The problem is that the politicians and corporations that have the stronghold on the people don't give a damn about our self worth.  If they did, do you think we would be in this mess now?  These are the people Mr. Depressed Anonymous Donor's  billboards should be targeting, not the people who are paying for the despicable actions of the powers that be. 

It is not the job of the American people who are suffering through this recession to fuel the donor's happy pill supply.  He/She's depressed?  Don't you think we have enough on our plate like lost homes, lost jobs, lost retirements, and  lost health care?  We know that we can pull ourselves up by the boot straps.  We are just looking for that light the end of the tunnel and wondering how long it will take before it appears.  At the same time, we need to place focus and awareness on those who took part in destroying lives while pushing for accountability, not bailouts and slaps on the wrist.  Not all of the crooks are behind bars!

May be the Recession 101 campaign had its heart in the right place and I am being unsympathetic.  May be they actually do care about how the American people are feeling and not just looking to boost their dispositions.  After all, positive attitudes are much needed, but this was a weak attempt and is actually rather patronizing given the dire circumstances.  Please, don't try to dumb us down anymore than what has already been attempted.  Obviously Mr. Depressed Anonymous Donor has enough cash on hand to pay for these words of enlightenment for Mr. I Can't Keep a Roof Over My Family's Head. 

Excuse some of us for worrying about our future and wondering just how low are we going to sink before it is all over.  Excuse us for feeling a little angry at the jackasses who got away with our money.  Excuse us for making you feel bad Mr. Depressed Anonymous Donor, forcing you to spend money on billboards telling us how to feel and behave.  If you want to make "steamed" folks like me feel better, here's a few campaign messages Recession 101 can add to their repertoire.

Corporate America and Greedy Government started this recession.

Interesting fact about recessions...they do end, but not until you are broke!

Stop obsessing over low retail sales and hire a few people who buy your shit.

Stimulus is a four letter word! J-O-B-S!

Wall Street gets a bonus for blowing up your retirement fund -- now smile, damnit!

A Legend Leaves Us

The Most Trusted Man in America, Walter Cronkite passed away today at the age of 92.  For those of us who grew up in the 1950s and 60s, television news was an entirely different industry.  Walter Cronkite was an icon in his field reporting with an integrity and objectivity that we do not see today.  It was news, facts that streamed through our television sets in those days, allowing us to form our own opinions without the divisiveness of the infotainment characters that appear before us today.  

At one time it was a noble profession.  Anchors like Cronkite were honest brokers of information through some tumultuous times with very few editorial moments.  In Cronkite's case, I distinctly remember his understandably emotional moment while announcing JFK's death, quickly regaining his composure so he could continue to report the facts to the public.  He told us what we needed to know.

The American people welcomed Walter Cronkite into their homes every evening.  Today, he was welcomed into his heavenly home.  Rest in peace good man.

And that's the way it is, July 17, 2009.  

Hello, I Don't Work for You

 Can we just talk about those self serve checkout counters?  They are popping up everywhere, even in Costco!  I refuse to use them and here's why.

First, that piece of machinery probably took someone's job.  A person, you know, who given even the slightest bit of personality is better than listening to someone tell me "please scan your next item or please insert payment now" in their syrupy robot voice.  It is so insincere!  I'll wait in line, thank you very much, if it means a person gets a paycheck.  And please, don't give me the spin that the checkers were all moved to the floor to provide customer service.  I have not seen this at all.  In fact, I engage  employees all the time about their work environment when I am shopping.  The true facts are these companies that taut their respect and love for their employees, their best asset, are usually knee deep in you know what.

Second, I do not work for these establishments but they want me to do their work.  No way.  If you want me to check myself out than I want a paycheck.  Would you like me to stock your shelves too while I am here?  It was bad enough when we were all forced to pump our own gas and use ATM machines.  I refuse to go any further than that.  Why are we deleting the human factor?

I created a scene not too long ago when a store associate told me that I had to use the self serve checkout because no other registers were open.  "Oh really", I said, "well get me a manager.  I do not work here."  She begrudgingly opened her register to check me out and a flock of self servers got behind me.  I told her, "I know you might not be happy about this, but it ensures you take home a paycheck.  One day you may thank me." 

Third, the lines move very slow at these checkouts.  Why?  Well, for starters there seems to always be some malfunction going on with the apparatus.  Robot voice:  There has been an error.  Please remove the item from the bag.  Do not place items in bag that have not been scanned.  Please contact an associate for assistance.  These malfunctions are likely to happen when you are in a Home Depot and purchasing a toilet or a dozen 2x4s.  The robot voice wants you to place your toilet in a bag.  When you can't put your toilet in the plastic bag, you have to call for assistance.  Also, people tend to get confused and frustrated with these machines.  God forbid if you push the wrong button--productivity and performance are out the door.

No, I want service.  I want someone to be engaging and may be ask me "how are you today?"  If I am having a bad day and don't want to engage, well that's okay too.  I am the customer and the customer is always right.  Sorry, but that is how I feel.  As far as the cost savings rhetoric...has anyone seen prices going down lately?  Oh, it keeps prices from going up.  I see.  Well, that's not happening either -- prices are still rising. 

I see no advantage to these cockamamie machines at all.  With everyone going self check, warehouse style, and Chinese manufactured while maintaining about the same prices, I ask...where is your point of differentiation?  Why should I shop in your store?   

Call me old school, call me old fashion, but I prefer unique over mundane.  My life is filled with enough machines and contraptions.  I still enjoy having people around me, the kind that breathe air, have more than twenty words in their vocabulary and earn a living.  

Warning:  The below video of a self checkout experience is extremely graphic and not suitable for children.

When the Parents Are Out of Town

I know I am going out on a limb here, but this is the kind of thing I would have done as a kid. As a parent, I am not so sure how I would have liked this though. I hope they have good Homeowner's Insurance. Bummer that we have to worry about such things. It does look like fun and what a great memory years later when they all get together.  I know, I know someone could have been hurt but it still looks like great fun.  Risky, but ingenious...enjoy!

America's Turn

I don't know how much is manufactured on these reality talent shows.  I don't watch America's Got Talent, but I happened to see this video on Yahoo News.  It's sort of the American version of the Susan Boyle phenomenon, and that's what I mean by how much of this is manufactured.  You would think that everyone learned the lesson with Susan about judging a book by it's cover during the British version.  You don't have to be the stereotype picture of celebrity to be talented. 

Of course, I was moved to tears watching this guy.  I do love a good "underdog" success story.  Mr. Skinner has a great voice and he really can play that guitar.  But, what really does it for me, is seeing that there are people in this world who are sincere, humble and grateful.  It just touches me.  And that is the part that I hope isn't manufactured. 

Big Brother Speaks

Remember when you were a kid and the world was your playground?  School yards, vacant lots, street corners, parks, the woods...stomping grounds of every size, shape and venue at our fingertips.  Well, today I got the surprise of my life and realized that times have indeed changed. 

RJ and I decided that we would pick up the pace on our morning walk with our two dogs, Murphy and Vinny.  All four of us could shed a few pounds and it occurred to me that to accelerate this process, perhaps our walk should turn to a faster pace, or at least a trot.  We set out for the track at the local high school near our house.  RJ, who is recovering from an episode of rhabdomyolysis, could either sit in the bleachers and watch me lead follow the dogs in this gallant effort, or saunder at a slower pace behind me.  As I explained this idea to him, he burst into laughter.  "How long has it been since you ran track?" he said.  I replied, "About thirty years, so what?  It's like riding a bike, you don't forget.  Remember , I played softball until I was forty!" 

As we approached the high school, we entered near the tennis courts, taking the dogs through a very narrow turnstile.  The track was on the opposite side of where we entered, a good half mile or so, but then I am not a great estimator of miles.  In my mind, it was far.  The dogs were in heaven as they stopped at anything of interest in this never before traveled land of Sniffsville. 

Halfway to the track, we passed by the school's two baseball diamonds.  RJ and Murphy were in the lead, while I stayed behind with the curious Vinny who was marking his territory every two feet.  Suddenly I heard this man's voice come out of the sky.  "You are trespassing on private property and we are taking your picture.  Please leave immediately or we will call the sheriff's department!"  Stopping dead in my tracks, I watched RJ's picture being taken as he walked under a camera perched on a very tall pole! 

"You have got to be kidding me!", I yelled, as RJ turned and looked at me.  I changed direction to avoid the camera, catching up with him.  "Can you believe this?", I said.  "This is 1984 for sure.  They would rather kids hang out at the local malls and spend money their parents don't have, or sit in front of a TV or computer screen and then complain that kids are obese today!"  I continued to complain.  "Since when are we restricted from property that we pay for with our taxes?  Can't kids play at the school yard any more?  Are there that many vandals and dopers today that a high school track is off limits?  How the hell do we get out of here now?  This is Independence Day and we are being photographed by Big Brother, what's up with that?  Where's our independence?  Where's our freedom?" 

I had visions of black and whites showing up with red lights flashing, sirens blaring and cops yelling "get down on the ground!"  Although I was a little anxious, I have to say, I was really angry.  Angry that I am forbidden to enter the property of a local public school!  I understand that there are challenges in schools today but is this the right approach to this problem?  Is this not over the top surveillance?

As we moved on, we saw a couple running the track with their dog.  When they were within speaking distance, we told them about the "talking camera" as we passed the baseball diamonds.  They thought we were hearing things and seemed unfazed by our testimonial, preferring instead to continue their jog around the track.  I said to RJ, "Little do they know, but they are common criminals by today's standards, not fitness enthusiasts, as I am sure they brag to their friends!"

We walked along the high chain linked fence until we found a turnstile that allowed us to exit the grounds.  As we entered the turnstile, a big fat sign stared at us -- NO ANIMALS ALLOWED.  "Well how do you like that", I said to RJ, "they have us on two counts of breaking the law!  We better make a quick getaway!"  RJ said, "it's a little too late for that.  I am already in their line up photos!"  "Yeah, kind of creepy", I said.  "Now you can be a suspect in any crime they want to pull you in for!"

Yes, this seems to be taken right out of Orwell's book 1984.  I read the book years ago while in high school.  I wrote in my essay that 1984 was a warning of what could come if we didn't adhere to our common sense.  I trusted that Americans would never allow their government to abuse their power in the way that Orwell described.  I could never imagine a "Big Brother" society. 

Little did I know back then that 1984 would become more than fiction.  It appears it may have become a business model for tyrannical institutions and government, using tax dollars to fund these devious schemes under the guise of protecting us.  (Patriotic Act, anyone?).  Who knew that one day I would become a common criminal for simply wanting to run my dogs on a local public high school track!

Happy Fourth of July

I have been on somewhat of a hiatus but plan to return to blogging soon.  I hope you all have a safe, sound and happy Fourth of July!